So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
