i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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