I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
