I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize