He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
