how do flat chested girls get laid?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
