If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
