Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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