I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
