Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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