do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
