he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Enjoy the penises
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
