Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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