hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I am midnight drunk by noon
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize