Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
