Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
