dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
did i walk over a car last night?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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