Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
