I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
