I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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