Too much gin, very little bucket
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
