Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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