Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
