and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Randomize
