i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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