I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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