I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Randomize