Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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