just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
