i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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