you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
