dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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