So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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