well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Randomize
