Do you still have your period?
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Randomize
