so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
he fucked my hip out of place.
As shirtless as possible
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
