she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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