glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
