How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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