I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
