Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
