do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
