It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
