have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
