Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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