i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
