I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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