Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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