Porn is love you can see.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
