I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Randomize
