i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I just forgot I was standing up.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
