I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize