does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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